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Do it yourself
Joe woke up one morning with an enormous boner and looked for his wife, but she had awakened and was preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Joe was afraid he might spoil things by getting up, so he called his little boy and sent this note to his wife:
THE TENT POLE IS UP, THE CANVAS IS SPREAD, THE HELL WITH BREAKFAST, COME BACK TO BED.
The wife answered the note and sent it back by the boy. It read:
TAKE THE TENT POLE DOWN PUT THE CANVAS AWAY THE MONKEY HAD A HEMORRHAGE NO CIRCUS TODAY.
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So he sent another note down. It read:
THE TENT POLE'S STILL UP AND THE CANVAS STILL SPREAD SO DROP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND COME GIVE ME SOME HEAD
To which she replied:
I'M SURE THAT YOUR POLE'S THE BEST IN THE LAND BUT I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW SO DO IT BY HAND !
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