Babygantor

==========
Adam And Eve

God called down to Adam, "My child, I have noticed you are lonely down there, so I want you to meet someone. Come and see, I call her woman, her name is Eve..."
Adam came to see her, he then returned to speak with God, hardly able to contain his excitement,"Oh, father, she is so beautiful, her shining blonde hair, and those gorgeous eyes! Why did you make her so beautiful?"
God answered, "So that you would love her my son. But check out the smell of that shining blonde hair...."
Adam leaves and later returns to speak with God, "Oh my Lord, she smells like the flowers in the garden of Eden in the sunshine just after the rain. Why did you make her smell so good God?" he answered....
and again God answered him,."So that you would love her my son....she will keep you company when you feel like you need a friend. Go forth and enjoy her my son, see how much fun you can have together"
Hours later, Adam returns, completely shagged out,"Father, she has many great qualities, the sex was great,she can please me greatly physically, I enjoyed that immensely, but Father, why is she so dumb?" to which God replied, "So that she would love you my son"

Auto Dreamland

==========
Traditional Roulette

An african ambassador visited Russia and was entertained by his opposite number, the Russian ambassador. For three days, the African ambassador was wined, dined, and generally treated to the best hospitality that Russia had to offer.

On the last day of his visit, the Russian ambassador said, "As your stay is coming to an end, it's time for you to play our traditional game, Russian roulette. One of the six chambers of this gun is loaded - you spin the cylinder, point the gun at your head, and pull the trigger."

This phased the African slightly, but he was a proud man of a warrior people, and to show fear would be unthinkable. Both men took their guns, spun, and pulled the triggers.

Both chambers were empty, and both ambassadors breathed a sigh of relief.

The African ambassador was impressed with the couragous game, and thought hard about the subject before the Russian Ambassador was due to visit his country the next year.

When the visit came, the African ambassador treated the Russian with all hospitality, until the final day of his stay. Leading him to a private room in the palace, the African ambassador spoke, "Now, time for you to sample our game, African roulette". He then led the Russian into the room, the only occupants of which were six stunning and naked women.

The African ambassador said, "These women are the most beautiful members of one of our tribes. Any one of them will give you a oral sex - take your pick".

The Russian was not entirely averse to this idea, but he couldn't see the connection with Russian Roulette. He said, "Well, ok, great, but where's the roulette part? Where's the danger?"

With a big grin on his face, the African ambassador answered:

"One of them's a cannibal."

Woman Speed Limit

==========
Peeing With God's Help

70-year-old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with normal results. Dr. Smith said, "George, everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with yourself, and do you have a good relationship with your God?"

George replied, "God and me are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so that when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (poof!) the light goes on when I pee, and then (poof!)the light goes off when I'm done."

"Wow," commented Dr. Smith, "that's incredible!" A little later in the day Dr. Smith called George's wife. "Thelma," he said," George is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and (poof!) the light goes on in the bathroom, and then (poof!) the light goes off?"

Thelma exclaimed, "That old fool! He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"